I might step on some toes, but here goes…

Sometimes it’s not the enemy… it’s you, but blaming the enemy keeps YOU from being accountable for your actions, and it keeps YOU comfortable in your mess. Now, that mess could mean anything. It could be YOUR own ways, a lack of faith, living with a victims mentality, and so many other things people are comfortably struggling with. You would think that struggling is uncomfortable, but some people have gotten so accustomed to it that it has become their way of life. They blame the enemy for showing up to the fight, but they don’t take accountability for being unprepared. Instead, they just lay there and take the punches and complain, when God has equipped them with everything they need to fight their battles.

This battle is not for the faint of heart, and Jesus said, we each have to carry our cross. If you claim to be a child of God, stop living with a defeated mindset. As long as YOU continue to live with a defeated mindset, you’ll continue to lose, because in your mind, your situations or what you see has already won… You better come out of that and get back in the game. Stop taking punch, after punch, after punch and put on the whole armor of God and fight back.

God doesn’t have any cowardly soldiers. Get out of YOUR feelings! I purposely capitalized YOU and YOUR because when you choose to blame people, or even the enemy for your lack of faith, success, or anything else you feel you lack in your life, it’s not really about them, it’s about you. Everything else should be a non factor, because you should be confident in who you are and whose you are. The enemy only have the power you give him.

Take your power back by getting out of your feelings. At some point you must learn to let go… Quit comfortably struggling and get my new book, “How to let go and let God.” Click below! ❤️

One way that God has shown His love for us, is by giving us the gift of free will. While it may sometimes feel like a blessing and a curse, we cannot deny the fact that free will is an act of love. It is a blessing to have a choice of what we want to do; however, God has told us beforehand that there are blessings and curses that comes as a direct result of our choices. Some people will argue, if it’s free will, why do we get punished for making choices outside the will of God? A person with human logic cannot understand this, but a person with understanding of who God is, can. 

The Word of God says, in Galatians 6:8, “Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature. But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit.” Sin cannot produce eternal life, but the blood of Jesus can! All we have to do is go to God and accept His forgiveness that comes through Jesus Christ. Hebrews 9:22 (ESV), “Indeed, under the law almost everything is purified with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins.”

In the garden of Eden God told Adam and Eve that disobedience would bring death. He could have made us be obedient and submissive to Him, but that’s not love, and God is the definition of love. Love doesn’t make you do the right thing, it inspires you to do the right thing. Love doesn’t mislead you, but love tells you the truth, no matter how bad it hurts. The Bible tells us in James 1:14-15, “Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.” 

So, we must make wise choices in life. Choices that leads to life, health, love, prosperity and the favor of God. We must exude the fruits of the Holy Spirit. These things will bring favorable results. Will it always be easy? Of course not! But this is where God’s grace comes in. 

If we go to God and ask for His help, He will help us! God knows what we’re capable of doing by ourselves and what we cannot. The thing is, sometimes we are capable of making the right decisions in life, but we don’t. Instead, we serve our feelings, or other people or even an image that we try to keep up. When we do this, we must hold ourselves accountable for the outcome. Blessings comes inside the will of God and curses comes as a result of sin. Sin feels good now, but the price never feels good, later. You actually get cheated! Being obedient to God doesn’t always feel good upfront, but the payoff is worth it in the end, so, we have to make a choice. God said, in Deuteronomy 11:26-28, “Look, today I am giving you the choice between a blessing and a curse! You will be blessed if you obey the commands of the LORD your God that I am giving you today. But you will be cursed if you reject the commands of the LORD your God and turn away from him and worship gods you have not known before.” 

Our choices determines our course. What you do today will determine your tomorrow. If you want success tomorrow, you must start today. This great life you’ve envisioned for yourself won’t just fall in your lap, you must work for it. If you want your life to get better, begin to make better choices in life, in your health, in your thoughts, in your relationships and in your battles. Your faith determines your actions!

There’s a saying, “Choose your battles wisely.” Not everything that’s easy is right, and not everything that’s difficult is not of God. Sometimes, God is in the midst of the difficulties, because He’s trying to prune you. He wants us to make the right decisions so that we can be blessed and rise to new levels. He wants us to trust Him more than we trust our feelings. 

So, as you go about your day, make choices that you can live with later. Don’t make a decision that will hurt you down the road. Make decisions that will heal you, today! Make decisions that will bring success, in whatever way that definition means to you. Make decisions in which the end results will be love, joy, peace and eternal life, in Jesus name. ❤️

If you’re struggling with which way to go in your career, in love, or in life in general, this prayer will help you find peace and grace and the wisdom to move forward in faith by knowing that the Lord is our Shepherd. This prayer is also available on my podcast, you can access it here. ➡️ https://anchor.fm/shubricca-bell

Father God, in Jesus name. I come to you asking for only the wisdom that you can give. Your Word says, to ask you for wisdom and you will give it freely without judgment. Lord, you know my heart. You know that I have a mind to follow you. Lead me in the way of everlasting. Lead me in the way of truth. You’ve created me with purpose and no one can stop your plans for my life. Show me how to use my purpose to please you. Let the works of my hands bring you glory. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight. Direct me to purposeful relationships that will bring about the right fruit, fruit that will last. Let me hear your voice more than people’s voices or my feelings. Let me take the more efficient route, even though I confess that sometimes, I’d like to take the fastest; you remind me that this race isn’t given to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but to the person who endures to the end. Help me to endure, no matter how long the journey is, because I know without a shadow of doubt that as long as you are my Shepherd, I will get to where I need to be. I pray for our nation and the entire world. Help us to become spiritually awakened and wise, and give us a heart of flesh so that we turn to you. Teach us compassion, love, understanding and mercy. Deliver us from fear, evil and all the wiles of the enemy. Thank you for your patience, your love, and your grace as we travel this journey called life. Lord, we trust you with the direction of our lives. We trust you with whatever happens in this world, for you are still God, and you sit high and look low into the hearts of all. We thank you and praise you for answered prayers, favor and protection as we travel this road, this day and everyday, in Jesus name, Amen.

Ever been in a relationship where the vibe was typically good, and one bad thing happened and it changed everything or at least it changed your perspective? Whether it was a good working relationship with you and a business partner, a personal relationship, a relationship between you and a family member or whatever the case may be, remember how the relationship was never the same? And I’m not talking about in only a bad or awkward way, but good ways as well, because it changed your perspective and “grew you.” Sometimes it takes us going through something uncomfortable in order for our lives to change; especially when we’ve gotten so comfortable with “how things are,” no matter the relationship or situation.

The Bible tells us, “In all your getting, get understanding” (see Proverbs 4:7). So when you’re so used to things going “right” or at least from your point of view, when things go left, before reacting out of your feelings get some understanding. That would be the wise thing to do. Understanding saves a lot of relationships (no matter what type). It keeps that awkward vibe from floating around and clears the elephant in the room.
If you don’t get some understanding, then you’re just stuck with a big problem that both parties are too stubborn to try to resolve, because all they both see is, “the problem.” You can’t see each other’s perspective because something has come between the two of you and if you don’t come together in a way that resolves the problem (no matter who is at fault), then the two of you (or all of you, if you’re dealing with a lot of people) will either allow the problem to continue until it destroys one or all of you.

So, if you and a friend, a lover, a family member, a co worker, a church member or whomever once had a good thing going and something changed, but you believe the relationship is worth salvaging, then it’s up to you to be the bigger person. Tell them, “Hey, I’ve been feeling uneasy (or however you feel) about what happened between us, can we sit down and talk about this, because I value your friendship, love, etc. and I don’t want to lose you. Don’t be afraid to speak up! Let the person know how much they mean to you, instead of focusing on that one mistake they’ve made. We must learn to come together and work past our indifferences, and stop allowing our feelings to get in the way. Put your pride on the back burner. None of us are perfect, but we can do some pretty awesome things when we come together. ❤️ Praying for you!

Proverbs 3:5-6,23-26

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.

23 Then you will go on your way in safety,
and your foot will not stumble.
24 When you lie down, you will not be afraid;
when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.
25 Have no fear of sudden disaster
or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
26 for the Lord will be at your side
and will keep your foot from being snared.

Are your actions matching your desires?
It’s not enough to want something, if you don’t work towards it. “Faith without works is dead (James 2:17).” Read that again. Whether your desire is to become successful in your career field, get fit, start your own business, find true love, or whatever the desires of your heart may be, you simply cannot accomplish any of these things, if you don’t start. Don’t be a person who says one thing, but means the opposite in their heart. The Bible says, in Proverbs 23:7, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.” Don’t say with your mouth, “I’m going to do this or that, but in your heart you don’t have the will to begin or you refuse to let go of something that’s keeping you from achieving that goal. God wants to give us the desires of our heart, but a lot of times we’re torn. We’re on the fence about what we truly want, therefore, we’re not ready to receive what we pray for. If we receive what we’re not ready for, we will mismanage it. That’s why we are tested with what we have or where we currently are in life, before God elevates us or gives us those desires in our hearts. Luke 16:10, “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.” I personally know women who desire a husband, but they can’t get over their ex. I know men who say with their mouths that they want a wife, but they also still have that player’s mentality… I know people who want to be rich, but they’re constantly living above their means or they refuse to get up off their behinds! I personally, want a six pack or at least flat abs… I workout but, I refuse to let go of carbs… or at least limit them to a low level… 🤷🏾‍♀️ These are all heart matters. The heart wants what it wants, (in my case my stomach, lol) no matter what we say with our mouths, and nine times out of ten if we don’t start doing what we are “naming and claiming” then we will continue to serve our own hearts aka ourselves, until we allow the Holy Spirit to govern our lives completely. We have no problem giving God our soul, but what about our bodies, our finances, our comfort zones? God wants all of us. He doesn’t want us to “follow our heart” He wants us to follow Him! Jeremiah 17:9, “The heart is deceitful above all things
    and beyond cure.
    Who can understand it?”
You see, there are some things we have no problem giving to God, and well… some things we don’t want Him to touch, because we’ll be uncomfortable and we know that it will require more faith, more self discipline, and more sacrifice on our parts, and we’re unsure of exactly what that might require. We’re afraid of the unknown. We know God’s will for us is good, but we want to make sure that we can tolerate our personal cross before we bear it. This walk with Christ doesn’t work like that. We can’t try out our cross before we decide to bear it. That means we’re depending on our own strength. We supposed to pick that cross up and depend on the strength of God to sustain us! The question is. Do we really want His strength? Because it’s there! Or, do we want to keep doing things our way or what’s comfortable? In my personal life, I know that I can have a flat stomach if I get serious and use the strength of Christ, but do I really want to let the carbs go??? Carbs brings me comfort, but they also bring me back fat and a muffin top! 🥴😅 Lord knows I didn’t intend to make this about food, but what are the carbs in your life? No, not food. What are the things that brings you comfort, but are also holding you back from reaching your goals in life, or keeping you from operating at the level in which you should be? We have to get our hearts right, first. It’s not enough to say, “I can do all things through Christ,” If we don’t DO IT! What are some things that God has put in your heart? Now think about some things you may have in your heart that’s not of God, that could be keeping you from God’s best for your life. We have to come out of that mindset of wanting what feels, looks or tastes good at the moment, and think about what will benefit us in the long run. God won’t share the room in our hearts. So, if we have a stronger desire to do things our way, He will allow us. He gave us, free will. However, if we want the desires He has put in our hearts, then we must be fearless, and go at those things in His strength. We must die to ourselves. Matthew 16:25, “For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” Those dreams, goals, visions and desires God has placed in your heart, will require you to be uncomfortable for a season, but the end result will be well worth it! I’m ready, Lord. I want your best for me. Spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially and in every aspect of my life! Come on y’all! We can do this! If we do it in God’s strength! 💪🏾

I’ve learned that the best way to understand someone is to empathize with them, and the best way to empathize with them is to get out of your feelings and become selfless. You can’t understand anyone completely if all you hear is yourself. Your thoughts, opinions, and feelings are your perceptions of yourself and the world around you, and not necessarily others truth. So, we must be discerning before becoming defensive, and we must not only give an ear to hear but a heart to listen to what people are saying to us. Be wise in the way in which you deal with people, but also be understanding.

Proverbs 4:7

Wisdom is supreme  —  so get wisdom.

And whatever else you get, get understanding.

God allows us to go through so that we learn the lesson and attain wisdom. That wisdom should be applied to future situations. Don’t ignore wisdom, it will save you from many mistakes and consequences you may not be prepared for. Listening to your feelings may feel good for a moment but it also causes you to become complacent. While wisdom and sound judgment will lead you to your destiny. Be cautious about who  and what you’re listening to. The wrong thoughts and the wrong advice can lead you to a path of repeated mistakes and wasted time. So, when in doubt, go for what you know (based on God’s Word) and not for what you feel. Remember, wisdom is your friend. Her truth may hurt you sometimes, but it will keep you from self destruction. Proverbs 4:6-7 (NIV), “Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.”

Learn to filter your words. When I was younger, I had no filter. I spoke whatever came to mind and that wasn’t always a good thing. You see, it’s one thing to be up front and honest about your feelings but it’s another thing to say what’s on your mind… The Bible tells us, Ephesians 4:29 English Standard Version (ESV)

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

If it’s going to do more damage than good, don’t say it. Keep those thoughts to yourself. If you wouldn’t want someone to say it to you, don’t say it to them, consider other people’s feelings. You can be honest and meek at the same time. Colossians 4:6, “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” Before we speak, we should first consider our thoughts. Our mood oftentimes set the tone for our speech. We should also think about what point are we trying to get the receiver to understand. I guarantee you that your point won’t be received if the person you’re talking to feels attacked. Let me just also say, you don’t have to speak on everything you know, and your personal truth is not everyone’s reality. Some things are better left unsaid. Proverbs 21:23, “Whoever guards his mouth and tongue Keeps his soul from troubles.” Listen, words can be as bitter as a lemon or as sweet as honey, and if you use them wisely, they can either save your life or become like venom to your soul. This is coming from someone who has learned the hard way, what words can do. My big mouth has gotten me in trouble plenty of times, until God had to literally sit me down and put me in time out for a while. So, watch your mouth folks. I know it can be hard sometimes, especially when you just want to give someone a piece of your mind or show them that you’re on to their little games or whatever. Sometimes it’s best to be quiet and let folks make a fool of themselves, by themselves. Before you allow their actions to bring out the worst in you, remove yourself long enough to gather your thoughts, make sure they’re seasoned with grace 😁and then come back and communicate with the individual after you gotten a little more Jesus in you, because we all need a little more Jesus at times. I know I do. The following scripture has been my personal prayer, especially when I’m feeling some type of way and I need the Lord to order my steps and help me to speak the words HE would have me to say… ➡️“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my strength and my Redeemer.” – Psalm 19:14

Listen… a butthole will be a butthole regardless of what you do, or what you do to it… Let me explain. If a person has jacked up morals, or if a person’s damaged, then they will behave accordingly. It has very little or nothing to do with how good of a person you are or how good you are to them. If they’re a butthole, then they’re going to be with the 💩, regardless!

It just frustrates me when people make excuses for their disrespectful or someone else’s disrespectful or shady behavior. Being a good and decent human being shouldn’t have anything to do with the actions of other individuals or their actions towards you. Yes, they may make you feel a certain type of way, but you shouldn’t be giving them your power by responding negatively to negative energy. Neither should you take a person’s weaknesses and use them to your advantage, so that you can selfishly benefit from their suffering.

We need to treat people the way we want to be treated, because what goes around comes around, and if you’re out here looking out for yourself regardless of how it affects those around you, then please believe that eventually you’ll get a taste of your own medicine in some way. Luke 6:31, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Galatians 6:7, “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.”

If you’re a good person and you’ve been misused or abused in any way, please don’t allow those negative actions that people have committed towards you, to get inside of you. Don’t become like them, become better. Keep being the person you are but apply wisdom, knowledge and understanding to your life as well. These three things will help guide you in life. The Word of God says,

James 1:5 New International Version (NIV)

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Listen, it’s not your fault that you were good to someone who was bad to you. It’s not your fault that you were loyal to someone who was disloyal to you. It’s not your fault that you kept it one hundred with someone who kept it ten with you! Straight up! Learn from what you go through! Don’t become cold hearted, but do become wiser. The truth is, we can’t protect ourselves from being hurt, at some point (if you really desire love) you’re going to have to be vulnerable and run the risk of getting your heartbroken. If you try to protect your heart from being broken, you’ll never find love because you’re not fully applying yourself. Continue to produce the fruits of the Spirit and regardless of what you go through or what someone does to you, you’ll always come out a winner! Galatians 5:22-23, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 2 Corinthians 2:14 (GW), “But I thank God, who always leads us in victory because of Christ. Wherever we go, God uses us to make clear what it means to know Christ. It’s like a fragrance that fills the air.”

If you’re finding yourself dealing with the repercussions of having your love used, abused or betrayed, then you must click or copy and paste the link below to get your copy of my book “Betrayed with a kiss.” https://www.amazon.com/dp/1976360064/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_5f7pBb5JJDT3H

Remember, you are not a victim, because Christ has made you victorious!