Some people try to “control” their current relationship because they were hurt in the past and that pain left them feeling powerless. So, they build walls, become uncompromising, manipulative or even run, in order to protect themselves from being hurt again; but truth is, they’ve never healed. They are hurting themselves by dwelling on the pain and allowing what should have been a lesson to become their life. You can’t “control” love. Love is freeing, and it’s organic. People mess it up when they move too fast, or interfere with the natural growth process of the relationship by trying to make their new relationship what the old one should’ve been. Look, this isn’t a “do over” with your ex. Give your current relationship a chance to grow and prosper. You can’t set unhealthy boundaries and come up with all these restrictions if you want someone to get close enough to truly get to know you. Get over what didn’t work out in the past and give your future a chance. For more insight, listen to my podcast by clicking the link below.⬇️⬇️⬇️
The enemy uses fear as a means to divide and conquer people, but God uses love as a way to restore faith and bring people together. Many people think that the opposite of fear is faith, but it’s not, it’s love. The Word of God tells us, in 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” Secure yourself in the love of God. His love is sure to protect, affirm and keep you. Jesus said, in John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” Seek life today, and be filled with the love of God through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Now is the time, more than ever, to respond with love instead of react with fear. Be kind to one another. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Be compassionate. Show sympathy. Smile. Encourage and support one another. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but one thing’s for sure, love will get us through it, if we stand together. Stand in love or fall in fear. I make this pledge, to love. ✊🏾❤️ Will you do the same? 1 Corinthians 13:13, “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
Sometimes, you have to love people from a distance… If they make you sick, literally, I’m talking about to your stomach, because you’re so stressed out, anxious and upset about how they’re mistreating you. Do not be afraid to love them people from over here. You let them stay over there, and for the sake of your peace of mind and well being, you keep your distance. Set some boundaries. You have to when dealing with toxic individuals, and don’t expect more from them than you should. Expect people to be exactly who they are, because when you get excited about their potential, those false expectations are only setting you up to be disappointed. Psalm 118:8 says, “It is better to trust in the LORD Than to put confidence in man.” You see, the problem with many of us is that we get excited too quickly. When someone’s nice to us or treats us better than we’re used to, we get excited, and we jump right in. We trust them, without testing their spirit. Just because someone makes you FEEL good doesn’t mean that they have good intentions. That’s how evil lures you in. The enemy gives you what you want and then he destroys you, if you let him. That’s why we must be on guard and in the Spirit at all times because the enemy is waiting to catch us slipping, but aren’t you glad that we serve a God, that even when we don’t know we’re in danger, He’s protecting us! Good God almighty! I could shout right there. That is why it’s very important that we remember Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” Our own understanding will have us somewhere jacked up… broke, busted and disgusted, because we put our trust in our feelings and allowed our hearts to lead us into the hands of people who mean us no good. You can’t trust your heart. It’s flesh and desires the things of the flesh. Jeremiah 17:9, says, “The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?” If you can’t trust your own heart, who can you trust? I’ll tell you who. The Spirit of God. 1 John 4:1 says, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God.
For more insight, listen to my Podcast, by clicking the link below, and feel free to subscribe to my podcast and leave me some feedback there as well! ❤️
Are your actions matching your desires?
It’s not enough to want something, if you don’t work towards it. “Faith without works is dead (James 2:17).” Read that again. Whether your desire is to become successful in your career field, get fit, start your own business, find true love, or whatever the desires of your heart may be, you simply cannot accomplish any of these things, if you don’t start. Don’t be a person who says one thing, but means the opposite in their heart. The Bible says, in Proverbs 23:7, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.” Don’t say with your mouth, “I’m going to do this or that, but in your heart you don’t have the will to begin or you refuse to let go of something that’s keeping you from achieving that goal. God wants to give us the desires of our heart, but a lot of times we’re torn. We’re on the fence about what we truly want, therefore, we’re not ready to receive what we pray for. If we receive what we’re not ready for, we will mismanage it. That’s why we are tested with what we have or where we currently are in life, before God elevates us or gives us those desires in our hearts. Luke 16:10, “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.” I personally know women who desire a husband, but they can’t get over their ex. I know men who say with their mouths that they want a wife, but they also still have that player’s mentality… I know people who want to be rich, but they’re constantly living above their means or they refuse to get up off their behinds! I personally, want a six pack or at least flat abs… I workout but, I refuse to let go of carbs… or at least limit them to a low level… 🤷🏾♀️ These are all heart matters. The heart wants what it wants, (in my case my stomach, lol) no matter what we say with our mouths, and nine times out of ten if we don’t start doing what we are “naming and claiming” then we will continue to serve our own hearts aka ourselves, until we allow the Holy Spirit to govern our lives completely. We have no problem giving God our soul, but what about our bodies, our finances, our comfort zones? God wants all of us. He doesn’t want us to “follow our heart” He wants us to follow Him! Jeremiah 17:9, “The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?”
You see, there are some things we have no problem giving to God, and well… some things we don’t want Him to touch, because we’ll be uncomfortable and we know that it will require more faith, more self discipline, and more sacrifice on our parts, and we’re unsure of exactly what that might require. We’re afraid of the unknown. We know God’s will for us is good, but we want to make sure that we can tolerate our personal cross before we bear it. This walk with Christ doesn’t work like that. We can’t try out our cross before we decide to bear it. That means we’re depending on our own strength. We supposed to pick that cross up and depend on the strength of God to sustain us! The question is. Do we really want His strength? Because it’s there! Or, do we want to keep doing things our way or what’s comfortable? In my personal life, I know that I can have a flat stomach if I get serious and use the strength of Christ, but do I really want to let the carbs go??? Carbs brings me comfort, but they also bring me back fat and a muffin top! 🥴😅 Lord knows I didn’t intend to make this about food, but what are the carbs in your life? No, not food. What are the things that brings you comfort, but are also holding you back from reaching your goals in life, or keeping you from operating at the level in which you should be? We have to get our hearts right, first. It’s not enough to say, “I can do all things through Christ,” If we don’t DO IT! What are some things that God has put in your heart? Now think about some things you may have in your heart that’s not of God, that could be keeping you from God’s best for your life. We have to come out of that mindset of wanting what feels, looks or tastes good at the moment, and think about what will benefit us in the long run. God won’t share the room in our hearts. So, if we have a stronger desire to do things our way, He will allow us. He gave us, free will. However, if we want the desires He has put in our hearts, then we must be fearless, and go at those things in His strength. We must die to ourselves. Matthew 16:25, “For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” Those dreams, goals, visions and desires God has placed in your heart, will require you to be uncomfortable for a season, but the end result will be well worth it! I’m ready, Lord. I want your best for me. Spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially and in every aspect of my life! Come on y’all! We can do this! If we do it in God’s strength! 💪🏾
Hi, everyone. Part five wraps us this series on “How to let go and let God.” Thanks so much for the feedback. I’m grateful to God that it’s making a positive impact and my prayer is that it makes a lasting impact. So, let’s recap. I won’t go into detail about the previous parts, so go back and read them and take notes if you need to, but here’s a quick review and an intro to part five. How to let go and let God:
1. Go to God
2. Give it to God
3. Forget about it
4. Don’t make it about them
5. Honoring God’s will for you
“For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.”
Honoring God’s will for you
You were predestined. This means before conception, God had a specific plan for your life. He knew you and everything about you before you were born. There’s nothing that has happened in your life that has caught Him by surprise. No one can stop His plans for your life, so you gotta learn to trust His will. When you belong to Him, you will accomplish what He has sent you to do, and you can do it one of two ways… His way or His way. 😆God’s way can be uncomfortable at times, but it’s effective and less time consuming than trying to do His will our way. When we try to do His will our way, we fail miserably; only to come back to Him and do things, His way. So, that’s what I mean by we can do it His way or His way.
Ephesians 5:14-17 New International Version (NIV)
14 This is why it is said:
“Wake up, sleeper,
rise from the dead,
and Christ will shine on you.”
15 Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.
God’s will for us is to allow Him to use us, right where we are. We must put ourselves aside and love like Him. 1 Peter 4:8, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” The thing that Jesus talked about the most was, love. If we loved each other like God does, the world would be in far better shape. Since the world doesn’t love like God, it’s up to us (God’s children) to be ambassadors of Christ, and show the world what the love of God looks like. God wants us to live in this moment. You’ve given Him your past, and tomorrow isn’t promised, so as the scriptures say, “Make the most of the day.” God has a message for us today. He has blessings for us, today. He wants us to be completely filled with His Spirit, today. He wants us to walk in victory today. He wants us to be a blessing to others, today. He wants to use you where you are. It doesn’t matter if you’re broke, busted and disgusted, or if you’re sitting on top of the world. Let Him use you. Your situation doesn’t need to change, your mindset does. (Go back and read part four if you need too) We must overcome ourselves in order to hear clearly from God. Every season of our life is purposed. The good, the bad and the ugly. You don’t have to know every detail concerning your future, you just have to give God your all in the present, and everything that’s meant for you, will find its way to you. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:33, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Becoming your best self in Christ is a process. A process takes time, so stop trying to rush God. Just keep walking, you’ll get there. Matthew 24:13, “But the one who endures to the end will be saved.” Remember, spiritually we’re always at war, and we have to fight with the Word of God. We can’t fight any battle while in our feelings. That’s a set up for failure, but if we trust God’s Word and continue to stand on it no matter what we go through in life, we will win. In Jesus mighty name. Amen.
I truly hoped you’ve enjoyed this. If you’d like me to touch on any other subjects, let me know. In the meantime, I wrote a book on How to let go and let God, it’s called, “Betrayed with a kiss.” Get your copy by clicking the link below. Blessings! 💕 Click here 🔽
John 4:14 (ESV)
“But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
“Sir, give me this water” the Samaritan woman said, in John 4:16. Sir… Give me this water! At some point or another, each of us has had a moment with Jesus, that went something like the scenario between Jesus and the woman at the well. We’ve asked Him for something, not realizing that His Spirit is all that we need. Like the woman coming to draw water. We go about our daily schedules. I don’t know about you, but to me, routines can get old… tiring. Like the Samaritan woman, I’m like, “Lord, if there’s a better way, hook me up!” She was like, if she wouldn’t have to come draw water, better yet, if Jesus had some water that quenched thirst forever, she needed for Jesus to put her on! Hook a sister up! I know that’s how she felt because I’ve been there. He’s told me things and it has went completely over my head, because I didn’t understand the depth of what He was telling me at the time. I’ve asked Him for something, not realizing that His Spirit was really what I needed, but God looks beyond the natural. He’s a supernatural God. Sometimes our soul is crying out for one thing and we’re totally oblivious, so we try to suffice that need with the things of this world or people, and sometimes, well oftentimes we are simply seeking a better way. A better way, according to our own way of thinking. During these times we need to remind ourselves of this scripture, “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths (Proverbs 3:5-6).” Thank God that He doesn’t look at our situation and give to us, He looks at our hearts and supplies our needs. One of those needs are His peace. If it wasn’t, Jesus wouldn’t have left us with it. He said, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid (John 14:27).” God knew that there were some things we’d go through in life that would have us asking Him, to “Give us this water.” In other words, “Give us a better way. Give us an easier way.” Our better way is more money, a husband, wife, family, success, health, wealth etc… Are any of these “better ways” wrong? Well, if we look at them to provide us peace, yes. Let’s keep it real. Some us of has tied our happiness to these very things. We think acquiring certain things, or status makes life better, easier or more peaceful, but it doesn’t without the peace that comes from the Holy Spirit. There’s a saying, “No God, no peace. Know God, know peace.” No matter what life throws our way, when Jesus lives in our hearts, we are content. You can be a millionaire and not be content (at peace) because life isn’t about the things of this world and the things of this world was never meant to fill that void that we’ve all had before accepting Christ and allowing His Spirit to live and work in us. His Spirit gives us peace and security like no other. So, today, think about something you may have asked God for or something that He has promised you. Have you been looking at things from a natural perspective? Have you limited God by your own way of thinking? Sometimes we take off with what He said, without giving any thought to what He’s saying. “My God shall supply all my needs,” oh, we love Philippians 4:19. We love any scripture that sounds good! We take off with it, as we should, not just feel good scriptures though, we should do this with every scripture, but not without understanding. Proverbs 4:7, “The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.” It’s very important that we take to heart what God is saying! He’s not saying, you’ll get everything you want. He’s not saying, things will always go your way. He’s not saying we won’t have struggles, bad days, disappointments or failed plans. He is saying, even in the midst of these things, He will provide us with everything we need. That’s why when life hits us hard, as children of God we can still stand in His power and declare His promises. 2 Peter 1:3, “By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know him, the one who called us to himself by means of his marvelous glory and excellence.” It’s all about His Spirit at work within us! When you have the Spirit of God, you can speak boldly like David when He said, in Psalm 23:1, “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.” I shall not want, because God lives in me, therefore I have everything I need. Period. He provides naturally and supernaturally and because I’ve received His Spirit, I will never thirst again!
Who is on the throne of your heart? Because whoever or whatever you put on the throne, you’ll submit to. Whatever you submit to has the power to make or break you. Psalm 51:10
“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
Some of us need for God to do a clean sweep of our hearts because somewhere along the way, we’ve collected a bunch of junk that we don’t need inside ourselves. We’re basically hoarding toxicity, because we’ve gotten comfortable in our mess, struggles and pain. The good news is it’s not too late to put Jesus in His rightful place which is the throne of our hearts. Revelation 3:20
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.”
Have you ever visited someone and before you went inside their home, the outside appearance was decent, but the inside looked like a landfill? Lol okay, maybe that was an awful experience I once had, but here’s my point. We look put together nicely on the outside. Even though Jesus knows how screwed up we are on the inside, He still knocks on the door to our hearts and wait for us to invite Him in. Isn’t that awesome? He knows what to expect and His love still chases us down. We invite all kind of ungodliness in, and Jesus is like, “Where’s my invite?” Instead of forcing His way in, He patiently waits on us to come to Him. You may feel like you’re a mental, spiritual or emotional ship wreck, and you may be asking Jesus, “Lord, are you sure that you want to be a part of this?” His answer is, YES! All you need to do is open the door. He will help you clean up that beautiful disaster on the inside. He makes all things new! All you have to do is unlock that door that’s keeping you a prisoner to your past or your pain, and tell the Lord, “I trust you Jesus. Come on in.” ❤️
We all have an idea of the type of spouse we want. We know what personality type we want, we know that we have to be physically attracted to them, we know what type of qualities we want them to have and so on and so forth. I don’t think it’s anything wrong with knowing what you want, but I do think that sometimes, if you only stick to a specific criteria of what you’re looking for, you could miss a great catch and potential life partner. If you are dating someone and the two of you have a strong connection, share mutual goals about love and life, you both are God fearing, and the two of you have what each other’s looking for in terms of values, character, and all the qualities one may look for in a spouse, then pursue that relationship. There will be flaws in that person, just like you and I have flaws, but just because they don’t line up exactly how your mental notes of how your future husband/wife should be, doesn’t mean they’re not the one for you. They very well could be. It just means you have to be reasonable in your expectations and you may have to compromise on some things. Why? Because again, no one is perfect. Compromising doesn’t mean lowering your standards, it means being understanding, compassionate and patient. This person in your life may have great qualities for the most part, but lacks communication skills. If the two of you want to build a great relationship, then you will need to work on that together, especially if you’re a great communicator, you would need to show them how. Trust would need to be established so that this person can begin to open up to you. You may have to put in some work, but relationships take work from both parties. It’s a team effort. I think that when we make these mental notes of what we want our future spouse to be, we should also jot down in our minds, the things we’re willing to work with our spouse on. Of course, they must be willing to work on these things as well, in order to have the relationship that the two of you desire. In this day and time, no one wants to help build each other up anymore. We pretty much want a perfect partner or at least the one that checks all the boxes in our heads of what the perfect partner should be. We don’t want to teach people how to love us, instead we say, their momma or daddy should’ve did it. Okay, yes, but sadly that doesn’t always happen or life gets in the way and emotionally mess some people up. The truth is, and some people may not agree, but you have to teach some people how to love you. Their definition of love and yours may vary depending on your background and life experiences. So, if you really like someone and they like you, and the two of you believe something real and great could come from you developing a relationship, then don’t be afraid to take a chance. You just might find love, even if you have to adjust your checklist for it. 😀 1 Thessalonians 5:11, “So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.” ❤️
Bobby Caldwell was on to something in his song, “What you won’t do for love”. You know the song. Sing a long with me. 🎶 “What you won’t do, to do for love
You tried everything but you don’t give up
In my world only you
Make me do for love what I would not do.”
Yas, Bobby! Listen, when you truly genuinely love someone, you will go over and beyond for them. I know someone out there feel me. Things you wouldn’t normally do, you find yourself doing, all in the name of love. I’m sure we’ve all had our fair share of things we’ve done for someone we love, be it good, bad or even stupid. Love has a way of taking hold of person’s heart and holding it captive to will it to its desires. Even when it’s painful and you want to stop the love in your heart from loving someone, you can’t. Not when you love them genuinely. The love I’m referring to is agape love. The same kind of love that God has for people. An unselfish, unconditional love. Love is the strongest high ever. Everyone’s chasing it. Some get one hit and is never the same. Others get it, lose it, just to search for it again. It’s addicting man. Jesus love is addicting. It’s that kind of love that causes you to never be the same. His love causes you to hold on to it, and never let go. No matter what life throws at you, you want more and more. His love is committed, and I think that’s what Bobby Caldwell’s song is basically about; love causes one to be committed. Come what may, I’ll do whatever it takes, but I won’t give up. I couldn’t give up even if I wanted to, because that’s just something love won’t let you do.
1 Corinthians 13:8(a)
Love never fails.
Too many people are waiting for a man/woman to save them… 🤨😒 When only Jesus has the power to save. Sorry to burst your bubble, but yeah… Fred can’t save you from your past. Lisa can’t save you from your present situation. Buddha can’t give you the peace that surpasses all understanding & Muhammad can’t get you into Heaven. John 14:6, Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” If you’re looking to anything or anyone besides God for love, validation, deliverance, peace, joy or inner fulfillment, then you’re wasting your time; like a person who’s determined to find a treasure with their eyes closed and no direction… Matthew 22:36-40
“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Whatever you seek, folks… it’s found in Christ. The Word of God has everything you need to get you through life. If your desire is love, why not go to God? He is the definition of love. He can teach you what real love is, how to love yourself, and how to love other people the right way without placing a false expectation on people or a person to be your knight in shining armor and save you from yourself or from your past. It’s a sad fact that many people are walking around with trust issues because they placed their faith in people… pastors, lovers, family, friends, famous people… and when those people’s skeletons fell out of their closets, people freaked out! They lost it, because truth is, they looked to these people in a way that they should’ve been looking to God. Stop looking to people. We’re all a mess in some way and only He who made us, knows what’s necessary to put us back together again. You don’t need to be a damsel in distress in order to find your king. You don’t need to be captain save a chick, in order to find your queen. If you’re looking for someone, look to the only Savior of the world. His name is Jesus. The King of Kings and Lord of Lords.
Acts 4:12 (CEV)
Only Jesus has the power to save! His name is the only one in all the world that can save anyone.