Let me just start off by saying, I have zero regrets about anything. I don’t regret getting married a week after I graduated high school and I don’t regret filing for divorce, 14 years later… Yeah… So let’s rewind back to when I was 18. We were in love. We were girlfriend and boyfriend on and off for years, and we’d overcame many obstacles and in our minds we loved each other and wanted to honor God, so we got married.

We weren’t trained on how to be a husband or wife though, and that was the problem, but you can’t tell a teenager anything who has their mind made up. 🤷🏾‍♀️ So, that was problem number one, we were not properly positioned… NEVERTHELESS, I will tell you this, even if you lack in a certain area, if you put God first, His grace will be with you, and it was… but I am certain that if I was in position to be a wife, and if he was in position to be a husband (God’s way) then we could have overcame everything we’d been through during the course of our marriage. You see, you don’t become a wife or a husband on your wedding day, you become those things long before. A girlfriend or boyfriend has a girlfriend or boyfriend’s mindset but it takes patience, discipline, wisdom, sacrifice, forgiveness and most importantly keeping God at the forefront to attain a successful marriage. You can’t have any of these things if you’re not trained, and if you’re not properly trained, unfortunately you’re not qualified to carry out the position, which in this case is marriage. The Bible says in Proverbs 18:22 that,

“He who finds a wife finds a good thing,

And obtains favor from the Lord.”

It doesn’t say, he who finds a girlfriend or boyfriend… this means we should be already in position. A girlfriend or a boyfriend can “love” you today, dump you tomorrow, and be in “love” with someone else the next day… but we all know that’s not real love, but that’s the mentality that a lot of “friends” have. They are quick to jump ship when things get rough, because it’s really all about I and not us… So, if you want a husband, position yourself to be a wife, and guys if you want a wife, position yourself to be a husband so that you know what you’re looking for and so that you’re dating with purpose. Which leads me to number two…

Your (the two of you) purpose should align. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, ““Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” Listen, I know that we’re not perfect, and sometimes we fall in love with people who aren’t the best for us. God is not trying to rain on your parade, He just knows what’s best for us! Things may not be complicated in the beginning with a person who believes differently than you, but trust me, later on it can cause chaos, because if you’re trying to follow God, and the love of your life isn’t… then what is the purpose of the marriage? How can the two of you really come together and experience true intimacy, if you have different faiths? It’s going to cause a hell of a lot of confusion within the relationship, and confusion is not of God. It’s also going to boil down to following God, or compromising your faith for the sake of trying to keep your husband or wife. I’m speaking from experience. In the beginning we were both focused on God, but when my ex husband became unfocused and started doing him, I also became unfocused and started doing things (outside the will of God) to try to keep him. After that didn’t work, I started doing me. Again it goes back to neither of us being properly trained on how to be a husband or wife. We thought love was enough and unfortunately it isn’t. There are so many more components that goes into maintaining a healthy and successful marriage. The last thing I’d say that will help you maintain a successful marriage is to remember that you’re a team, and that team consists of God, you and your spouse. No matter what, you must remain committed, just as you do in your faith. When things get rough in life, we shouldn’t lean to our own understanding (which happened in my case), we should seek God. Go to God for counsel, not your feelings. Ask God for advice, don’t just listen to people, because I will be honest with you, sometimes people will give you their best advice but it’s not always the right advice and most certainly not always godly advice. Remember there is no I in team, and to be honest, that’s a major reason why my marriage failed, because in some way, we both were equally selfish. We’re both responsible for our divorce, I would be a lie if I said, it was all his fault. I will not play the victim, I admit that I too was selfish. I wasn’t always a part of the team. Even if my ex went left, I should have stayed right with God, but many times I didn’t. Many times I listened to my feelings and I left God and went outside of my marriage. I’m not saying that had I never left God, or went outside of my marriage, that I’d still be married. I probably still wouldn’t be married if I’d done everything right, because again, IT’S A TEAM EFFORT! Lol Everyone has to be on board. Even though I went through a divorce, it lead me to my purpose. I never would have thought that would be the case, but here I am, and I’m at peace. I’m proof that God will give you beauty for your ashes, and that there is purpose in your pain. Today, I’m a self published author. I encourage people daily that there is hope in Jesus Christ, and I Biblically counsel individuals who’ve been through or are going through what I’ve been through.7FEBF0E7-A617-41E9-9FDF-2F5E6D2D0660Although I’ve had my fair share of disappointments, heartaches, and trials of all sorts, my joy is complete. I’m still learning, still growing and I am still training to be a wife. I’ve gotten far, but to be honest, I have a long way to go. Sometimes my feelings say, “I’m ready for a husband,” but wisdom tells me, I’m not quite there yet. I don’t want to rush into anything because the next one is definitely for the long haul. So yeah! Your marriage can work, or if you’re thinking about getting married it can be successful! Just position yourself, mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically #1. #2, Date with purpose. It is imperative that you are of one accord, which leads me to #3, remember that you are a team and God is the coach! The two of you should be running towards the same goal and never make your relationship about “I”. Make it about God, and then make it about each other. If you focus on pleasing God first, and then pleasing your spouse, and if they make their life about keeping God first, and then pleasing you… it could most definitely work and last a lifetime. Spoken from a person who has genuinely learned from her mistakes and is cautious not to make the same one twice. 


I couldn’t wait until I turned eighteen. I was determined to do whatever the hell I felt like. I was going to smoke weed all day and turn up every night. I’d graduated high school, I was paying my own bills, so why not? I didn’t see a problem with living what I called “my best life,” until I woke up twenty years later reaping the consequences of my past decisions.

I’ve always known the Word of God, it was something my parents instilled in me since before I was born. I had gotten saved when I was a toddler. In elementary and middle school, I would read my Bible daily. I’ve always loved God. I wish that I could paint a beautiful picture of me having no flaws, but that would be a lie, and I would not have a testimony.

You see, my testimony is what makes my story beautiful. I was that lost teenager who’d suffered heartbreak in the worse way. I’d lost my dad when I was fifteen and the way that I dealt with my pain was to smoke, drink and even become promiscuous with several people… boys, girls, men, women… it didn’t matter. I rebelled against my mother and I rebelled against God. I was angry, sad and lost.

I didn’t know that time would go by so fast. At first I was young and “enjoying life” partying, getting high and getting off… then one day I woke up and I was thirty eight with not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. I’d see some high school friends who were really living their best life, buying homes, getting married, raising families and loving their careers… meanwhile I was looking broke, busted and disgusted because every dollar I had was spent clubbing and getting high for twenty years! Imagine what I could’ve done with that money had I invested it into buying a home, going to school or by simply operating in my talent. I hit a low point, but the thing about rock bottom is, you can only go up!..

I made a decision to go to God first. I had to repent, because my way of coping with my dad’s death wasn’t working. It had only brought more misery and the thing is, I was comfortable in my misery for two decades. The drugs didn’t work, partying didn’t work, sleeping around didn’t work… I was still empty on the inside.

The thing about God is… He was always there. When He said, “I will never leave or forsake you,” He meant it! He didn’t run off when I was angry at Him for taking my dad. He didn’t deny me when I went astray. His love for me never failed me.

There are some things I’ve been through that should have killed me, but God! He made a promise to me that my present day glory will be greater than that of my past -Haggai 2:9. Today, I have been drug and alcohol free for a year, and I’ve rededicated my life to the Lord. Mind, heart, body and soul. I’ve also been celibate for eight months. I’m a work in progress, but I’m telling you that I have so much more peace.

I’d been searching for this peace for decades but I was trying to attain it my way, when God was right there the whole time. Had I taken a better road for my life, there’s no telling the success I’d have. I wasted a lot of years, but God is right on time, and I am confident that His love will get me on track. I’m just taking things one day at a time and completely placing my burdens in His hands. Oh, I finally have my own home! Yes, God blessed me with an amazing job and I was able to purchase a house. This is only the beginning for me, and I’m excited! I can’t wait to see where He takes me. I’m saying all of this to let you know that if you’re tired of doing things your way, surrender your all to God because He cares for you! He loves you unconditionally and wants what’s best for you. He doesn’t want you to live defeated and alone, He wants to fill you with His Spirit and give you peace and joy you’ve never known. When you decide to trust Him with your pain, He can heal you, set you free and deliver you, and His favor will do things for you that you could never accomplish on your own. ❤️

Deliver me from familiarity! I tried and I can’t do this on my own. I’m tired of coping and hoping, it’s time for a change. I keep going back because I know the feeling it gives me. I know what to expect when I go back to those familiar grounds. I know what it looks like, feels like, taste like, sounds like… and although it gives me a temporary feeling of pleasure, it’s also a temporary solution to escape my reality, my uncertainties, my disappointments and my own idleness. Help me to stay focused on the long haul, and give me the strength to endure these short term problems that’s really distractions to keep me from reaching my full potential in you. Keep me from becoming lost in myself. When I’m consumed with my grief, my loneliness, my shortcomings and setbacks, it keeps me living selfishly, because I’m only focusing on me. I do things that I don’t want to do, because it helps me cope with not being where I want to be in life. It’s no excuse, but I just want to be real with you Lord, because I need to be delivered from addictions, toxic relationships, double minded behavior and all the things I do that I know isn’t pleasing to you. Romans 7:20,25, & 8:1-2 says, “Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God’s law, but in my sinful nature a slave to the law of sin. Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.” So, I’m declaring my victory. I’m holding myself accountable for my actions. I will recognize those triggers (distractions) that are designed to hold me down and pull me back. No matter how difficult this journey of life gets for me, I will rely on you Lord Jesus, for strength. I will no longer shout, I receive it, and then do nothing about it. I will receive it (whatever you have for me), because I will put my faith in action and be obedient, so that I may attain it! Signed,

Truth is I’m tired, but I won’t go back.

In Jesus name. Amen 🙏🏾

Listen up! The devil is the father of lies!

John 8:44

You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.

Don’t believe a word that the enemy, his nymphs or people who have openly declared allegiance to him, says. The devil tried to temp Jesus with the things of this world, but Jesus knows who He is and all power is in His hands. He don’t need worldly riches. He made the world!!

Psalm 24:1

The earth is the Lord’s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.

Listen people, if your peace of mind and your happiness is tied to money or anything of this world… you will be empty forever.

The enemy will tell you that worldly things are the key to happiness, but it’s not. If you don’t have the spirit of God inside of you, then you will stay oppressed, depressed, possessed and be plagued with inner emptiness. You can’t take your money or vain glory with you once you die… This life is short. The enemy’s goal is to distract you and tell you what you want to hear. He knows the truth, but he’s the great deceiver… 

🗣🗣🗣 Wake up! Stop listening to these people who claim to be spiritually woke, but are as dead as a doorknob. 

1 John 1:5-9

This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.

It all boils down to who are you going to believe? The father of lies or the God of truth?

John 14:6

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

The enemy will make you think that doing what you want (outside the will of God) is freedom, but it’s actually slavery. It’s slavery to sin, and sooner or later sin will make you pay up… The final cost… it’s a price you can’t afford, but GOD!

The real reason the enemy wants you to stay in sin and reject the love of God, is because he knows how much God loves you, and he hates it! The enemy tells you what you want to hear, and then he goes before God and accuses you of doing things that goes against God. Keep your feelings in check y’all because he preys on your heart and your mind, because he’s really after your soul, and what better way to steal your soul than to mess with you mentally or emotionally? 

It’s real out here, but you can make it! Jesus loves you and died and rose for you to be reconciled to God for eternity! All you need to do is believe!

John 3:16

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Stay in armor my dear friends. I love you all, but God loves you most. Pray for people who have been deceived. Pray for people who know the truth but openly rejects it! Pray for yourself, so that when you are tempted, you will be able to stand and in the end, will be crowned with eternal life. Much love. ❤️

Ephesians 6:10-18 New International Version (NIV)

The Armor of God

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

Let me just say, that 🗣🗣🗣EVERY SINGLE DAY, I make plans to do one thing, and WRITING TAKES OVER! Lol Don’t get me wrong, I LOOOVE to write. I could do it twelve out of twenty four hours, and the only reason I don’t do it longer  is because, I am a mother of four and I also need to maintain balance in my life. I just be going about my life, with my plans, and then the Holy Spirit interrupts me like, “Hey, I have something to say.” And I be like, “Yes, Lord!”

Proverbs 16:3 (NLT)

We can make our plans,

but the LORD determines our steps.


I don’t have a problem when the Lord interrupts, because His interruption is more like an interception.

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

You see, oftentimes we do things that may appear to be harmless now, but if we continue to do them, they can become a hinderance. So, I thank God that He intercepts my plans. He did it with this post, because I was going to write about something totally different, but here comes the Lord!… Use me Jesus!


I just thank God for who He is. I thank Him that there’s no one like Him and I thank Him for seeing the outcome before I even begin, and changing my course so that I’m aligned with His good plan for my life. What we do today, will definitely impact our life in some way, tomorrow… With this in mind, just be more aware of how you’re spending your time. Make sure that you leave room for God to intercept. Also, make sure that your life is balanced.

You have to be able to multitask, when it comes to maintaining a balanced life, especially if you’re a parent or a guardian, or a husband or wife! You can’t get so wrapped up in one thing, that you neglect another area of your life or a person/people who are important to you. Some things require more attention than others, nevertheless the attention is required. Think about it this way.

Imagine this: There was a man who had a small leak in his roof. He was a man who worked hard everyday, all day, and every night when he came home from work, he said that he was going to fix that small leak in his roof. Well, a day turned into a week, a week turned into months and one day he got off of work, and all kinds of animals were partying in his kitchen! Raccoons, squirrels, mice, you name it! So, not only did he need to repair the hole, he now had to deal with a pest infestation.


Do you understand where I’m coming from? There’s nothing wrong with the man being a hard worker. You have to work so that you can take care of your house (to include your family). So, why didn’t he take care of the small hole before it became a big problem? The answer is short and simple. In this man’s case, work was more important.

It wasn’t that he didn’t have enough time, because let’s face it, everyone at some point in life has felt like there just wasn’t enough hours in the day, however… we make time for what’s important. So, handle your business in life and make your plans, but don’t neglect your spiritual man, because what may start out as you missing a day of reading your Bible could turn into a week, and then a week could turn into months, and then in a year, your life could be all out of wack (I hope and pray not), and you will be wondering… “Lord, what happened?” You know what He’s going to say, “You didn’t make time.”

So, make time for God today. Make time to go to your child’s game today. Make time to tell that loved one that you love them today. Make time to allow the Holy Spirit to intercept in your life today. Your future self will thank you for it! ❤️



“Lord, why can’t you make it easier?” This is the question I asked God today, and He immediately replied, “Why can’t you trust me?” I hate going through, and currently that’s exactly what I’m doing… GOING THROUGH! It seems like my faith is constantly being tested, and I’m just going to keep it real, a lot of times I literally freak out when I believe for God to come through one way, and He doesn’t. Just as I was typing the previous sentence, He came through in a way that said, “Everything will be okay.”

He didn’t come through my way, but He came through His way. He didn’t come through in my timing, nevertheless, He was right on time. You see, if it was up to me, I’d never have any issues. I’d never have days that I cried, or felt lonely, hurt or afraid. Life would be smooth sailing. Instead this is what my life feels like…


Yeah, I’m the man who got kicked in water… As if getting kicked in the butt with two feet isn’t enough. 😒

Jesus be a life guard, a life jacket and a rescue boat, because truth is I’m tired! I feel exactly how the disciples felt when Jesus was asleep on the boat, and the wind and waves came and tossed the boat about and they woke Jesus up saying, “Lord! Save us! We’re going to die!” I know that He is with me, but I don’t like being uncomfortable. I don’t like when the storms of life comes raging.

I’m going to keep it one hundred… I’m the bratty child of God. I want him to always tell me yes and I always want him to give me what I want. 🤷🏾‍♀️ But like a good good Father, He doesn’t always say yes, and He doesn’t always give me what I want.


You know why, because if He did, there wouldn’t be a need for faith. It would be too easy for us as people. We’d forget about what God has done and begin to think we’ve accomplished everything we have in life, on our own. We wouldn’t be appreciative. We’d think it’s what He supposed to do.

But His grace is sufficient ( 2 Corinthians 12:9), and it keeps me humble. I know one hundred percent that on my own, I don’t deserve any of the blessings He’s given me. So, why do I throw a temper tantrum when He doesn’t come through like I want Him to? Because I become afraid and anxious. I encourage thousands of people across the U.S. everyday, but that doesn’t mean I’m not human.

I experience the same things that everyone else  experience. 1 Peter 5:9 (NLT) “Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your family of believers all over the world is going through the same kind of suffering you are.“ I fall short and spiritually, I’m pretty sure that I fall out like a two year old having a fit when his or her parent takes something from them or tells them no.  I know God probably be like, I can’t take you no where child! 🤦🏾‍♀️


Which is probably why I keep going through the same type of test. I know He’s trying to strengthen my faith, because He literally can’t take me anywhere if I let every obstacle that I face, get me upset. Now don’t get me wrong. I’m only upset for a second, and then the Holy Spirit gets me in check, but I believe God wants me to be more consistent in my faith. When my situation looks impossible, instead of getting upset, He wants me to pray for wisdom and direction.

He wants me to trust Him that He already knew I’d face that obstacle, but He wants me to believe, and I do. I just have to learn to stop making things that I go through all about me, and learn to ask Him, “God, what do you require of me?” Hopefully I ace this test soon, because I’m tired of taking it. I know that once I past this test, there will be another one that I need to pass, but once I pass this one, I will have the wisdom to know how to deal with the next one. Thank God for Jesus, because I’m a hot mess with Him, so there’s no telling what or where I’d be without Him.

If you are going through like I am, repeating the same tests, and it feels like you’re stuck. I want you to know that God is only trying to strengthen our faith and teach you to exercise patience. The thing about strengthening one’s faith is, or learning patience is, you must be tested. 🤷🏾‍♀️ There’s no way around it. But we can do this, be encouraged! Romans 5:4, “And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.”

I know it’s frustrating not knowing what God’s going to do in your personal situation. The anxiety is real when facing the unknown. But it’s okay not to know, because He knows what’s best, even if we throw a fit! Sometimes we believe too small, so He allows us to face a challenge, so that our faith becomes bigger, bolder, brighter! You’re not really believing God, when you can clearly see a way.

Faith isn’t about everything going good and having everything under your control. Real faith is not seeing a way, but believing God will make a way. Real faith facing situations that’s out of your control but believing no matter what God is in control. Real faith is believing God can, but even if He doesn’t, you continue to trust Him anyway. Real faith is believing that God knows and wants what’s best for you even when He tells you no or doesn’t come through like you expected Him to.




In Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary, definition 2(a) of the word construction means the process, art or manner of constructing something. I’d like to focus on the very first word, which is process. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Don’t rush the process. Trust the process.” Usually “the process” is the wait…

How many of you know that construction takes time? Especially if we’re talking about something that’s built to last. 1 Peter 2:5 (NLT) “And you are living stones that God is building into his spiritual temple. What’s more, you are his holy priests. Through the mediation of Jesus Christ, you offer spiritual sacrifices that please God.”

Listen my good people, construction takes time! Putting you together, takes time. Putting me together, takes time. Putting the body of Christ together… TAKES TIME! We’re not magically transformed because we’re saved. When we give our lives to God, He begins a great work in us!

Philippians 1:6 (NLT), “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” Us learning, growing and becoming doesn’t end when we say yes to God. It continues for a lifetime. God is building us up and won’t stop His work within us, until Jesus comes back! We won’t reach perfection until we reach Heaven.

However, just because we’re not perfect, doesn’t mean that God is going to leave us in our mess. He’s going to construct us, and construction takes time. So, if you’ve been waiting on God, it’s for good reason… He’s working on your heart. Even if you think that you have little or no issues, please believe that there’s always something that you can improve on, and as a child of God, our Father wants us to be perfected.

He wants us to have all the tools that we need to navigate through life favorably in His will. How many of you can honestly admit that there was a time in your life when you got tired of waiting on God? 🙋🏾‍♀️I’m not ashamed that in the past, I’ve most certainly had these moments, so you know what I did? I took matters into my own hands and do you know what happened? I end up setting myself back even further than I was before…

So, needless to say, I learned to depend on God, and truly wait for Him. Instead of leaning on my own understanding, wisdom taught me to wait in faith. Listening with an open heart and mind to the voice of God. The more I listened, the more direction He gave and the more knowledge I attained. So, if you’ve been waiting a while, it’s because the reconstruction of your heart is going to take a while.

It is not God’s will to throw you into something you’re not ready for. How would you feel if you had no educational training or experience as a surgeon, and someone just threw you into a surgery room and said, “Perform open heart surgery on a certain individual”? You would probably have an anxiety attack! You wouldn’t know what to do! The pressure from being put into a situation you’re not ready for, could cause these same things to happen to you, IF you rush the process and don’t allow God to work on you!

Sure, your feelings will say you’re ready. Your situation may cause you to say, “Enough is enough.” People may pressure you into doing whatever… but listening to anything other than God’s voice will set you back, not help you move forward. The Word of God says in Matthew 6:33, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Change your perspective.

It’s not about you… It’s about what God wants to do through you! Think about all the great things you want God to do in your life… Now imagine His plans being even greater! Can you imagine it?

It’s true. His plans are even greater! But He has to build us up, and develop us into, so that through Him we are able! Life is deeper than attaining the things of this world. God is building something within us that’s not only good for a lifetime, but it will also last forever.

Psalm 27:14 (ISV)

Wait on the LORD. Be courageous, and he will strengthen your heart. Wait on the LORD!


Have you ever been at a crossroads in your life and wasn’t sure of which way to go? Maybe it wasn’t something as major as a crossroads. Maybe you were unsure of what you should do in a small situation that could have a big consequence if you made the wrong decision, therefore you needed God’s guidance. We all know God’s will for our lives, but what about when you need specific instructions on a particular matter? Well, I have good news, your specific instructions are in the Bible, and you’ll know 100% if God wants you to do something because whatever He is telling you will align with His Word.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.

The above scripture is the answer to the question you may be pondering. DO NOT LEAN ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING!

Do you know what our own understanding is governed by? It’s governed by human logic. It’s governed by what we see.

It’s governed by anxiety. It’s governed by fear. It’s governed by us! The problem is, God is no where in any of these things, and when God isn’t in it, it’s (whatever you’re dealing with) headed towards disaster. Your unique problem may not be in the Bible, but there is an answer specifically for you, in the Bible!

James 1:5

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Listen my fellow sisters and brothers in Christ, God will answer you. Talk to Him like you’d talk to your best friend, and He will respond like a good best friend and a good Father. Ask Him to remove anything that’s keeping your heart from receiving His Word. Get out of your feelings so that you can receive His peace.

Last, but certainly not least; upgrade your faith!

I believe that sometimes God doesn’t do things for us, because He wants us to make the right decision. He’s always with us, but He doesn’t always baby us. Just like us as parents, sooner or later we have to put our baby down so that he or she can learn how to crawl, then we have to allow them to stand on their own and eventually walk. Our Heavenly Father is like this with us! He will comfort and teach us what to do, then He will expect us to use the wisdom He’s given us to make the right decisions in life.

The answer we need isn’t always going to be as simple as black and white, and God isn’t always going to give us a sign so that we’ll know exactly what to do. Like a baby, we have to put one foot forward, and step out on faith, knowing God is right there to cheer us on and help us. There will be times when you just have to go in faith, because there is no right or wrong answer, it’s simply your choice! Sometimes faith will be all you have.

I will tell you this, as long as you’re going in faith (no matter what the situation is) and you have pure motives, God will honor your faith. Faith is always the right answer! God wants us to trust His voice, not what we see. His voice isn’t always going to make sense to us, especially when we’re on a timeline, because that’s when anxiety kicks in. Anxiety tells us that we need to take control of the situation.

Fear tells us that we’re running out of time, but faith tells us that God is right on time and always in control!

If you’re struggling to find the answer you need, and the answer isn’t simple, then go in faith! God will back you! Remember, “Share your plans with the Lord and you will succeed “ – Proverbs 16:3 (CEV)

Mark 9:23

“What do you mean, ‘If I can’?” Jesus asked. “Anything is possible if a person believes.”

When the answer isn’t clear, just go in faith! Faith is always the right answer!

God has a sense of humor. When you’re going through something, He sends people, uses places and things to send you a specific message and lighten your heart. I have challenges like everyone else. One of my challenges in life is learning to turn people (in specific family) loose when they refuse to want and do better in life. I’m going to be honest, I do all I can to lead them the right way, but sometimes it’s unappreciated and when this happens, I’ve learned to pray for them and don’t worry about them, because it’s literally all you can do.

It’s so funny because I’m currently working on a book/journal teaching people how to let go and let God. I get asked a lot, “How does a person let go and let God?” The answer is simple in my head, but in my heart, I struggle to let go. I struggle because I know what the streets can do to a person. I struggle because I know what it’s like for your family to be destroyed by selfishness and careless actions.

I struggle because I’ve went through what the loved one I’m trying to save, is going through, and I don’t want that person to go through the same things I did. Doing things apart from God may seem freeing, but you just end up in bondage. A person may go out into the world to look for healing, only to come back in even more pain. As much as we love our family, whether it’s a spouse, child, sibling, cousin, parent or whoever, it’s important to know that, we cannot save people… no matter how much we love them.

Acts 4:12 (CEV)

Only Jesus has the power to save! His name is the only one in all the world that can save anyone.

I accept that, but you know what I can’t accept? When someone’s careless actions directly affects you and other loved ones, especially when the person who’s being careless is a loved one too! I’m like come on, can’t you see what you’re doing to everyone else, not to mention yourself! I try to make them see the pain they’re causing others, but the funny thing about that is, they’re in pain themselves… and it’s hard to heal someone else when you’re consumed with your own pain. Pain has a funny way of keeping a person focused only on self… ask anyone who’s ever went through anything in life.

Anyway, I’ve come to realize it’s not me, it’s them… period. When people or a person you love deliberately hurts you again, and again, it has nothing to do with whether or not you’re doing something wrong, it has everything to do with them… and that’s just something you can’t fix. The only person who can fix that is them, and God. Even God don’t force us to get our lives together, we have to make a choice and then trust Him to help us. Change is about making a daily decision to be different and choosing to do better.

So, the humor part… I went into my Bitmoji stories on Snapchat (because a mini cartoon of me is both funny and interesting). By the way, they’re briefly entertaining. Anyway, Godzilla was blowing fire and running rampant outside of my Bitmoji’s home. My Bitmoji was looking out the window and worried that Godzilla was going to destroy her home, she talked to a friend who was over, and said, “I know it’s selfish, but I’m worried about Godzilla only destroying my home!”

The friend who was over told her (and this is no lie), “Don’t be so hard on yourself. Learn to change the things you can’t accept, and accept the things you cannot change.” 😱If you don’t think God doesn’t speak through cartoons, you better read that again! Then the Bitmoji friend told me to sit down and play a game while Godzilla continued to run rampant outside my cartoon home. Putting all of this into perspective, this means that you can’t control everything, so why worry?

Continue with your life. Also, when the cartoon Godzilla was running rampant outside of my Bitmoji’s home, she wasn’t worried about other people’s home being destroyed, she was worried about her home. It reminded me that it’s natural to want to keep your home (family) safe. It’s not that you don’t care about other people’s family (or in that case home), it’s just that things hit differently when you’re directly affected. It also made me realize that what I mentioned above, about when people are in pain, it causes them to “focus on self,” is so true.

Whether we’re the cause of our own pain or the cause of others, that pain is the consequence of our own selfishness. How we respond to that pain can also be selfish, especially if you refuse to let go and let God, by holding onto a person longer than you should or trying to force change on someone.

Note to self: Stop trying to handle things on your own… That’s selfish.

It’s time to stop trying to control the things we can’t, and change the things we can, and move on with our lives, leaving the rest up to God.

You may think you’re being strong, or not being a bother to God or others by trying to control the situation yourself, but that’s not strength, that’s selfishness… You see how being in pain works?… Let go and let GOD! In Jesus name. 🙏🏾

Have you ever been tired… but didn’t know exactly what you were tired of? You were just… tired. Those feelings are stemmed from frustration. Frustration creeps it’s way in when we lose focus. When we lose focus we lack insight.

We all have our personal challenges, and life will most definitely throw obstacles our way, but what we choose to stay focused on determines whether we capitulate or conquer. It’s not easy to not see trouble, when trouble’s in your way. However, dwelling on trouble, leads to depression, anxiety and many other issues (mentally, physically and spiritually). So, worrying doesn’t do your situation any better, in fact, it makes it worse. Jesus said, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” -Matthew 6:27

Listen, my dear friends, dwelling on what ails you, won’t change your situation. When you are faced with trouble, you can do one of three things. Accept it, change it, or leave it alone. If you can’t accept what you’re going through, change it, and if it’s impossible for you to change it, give it to God and leave it alone. Dwelling on the problem won’t fix it. So why pay it any attention? Do what you can do about it and trust God with what you can’t! It takes faith to do both! We have to get to the point as believers, that we’re like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.

Before being thrown into the fiery furnace said, If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king.

But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.”Daniel 3:17-18 No matter how heated things get, and no matter what we’re faced with, we need to have our minds fixed on Jesus! We need to know without a shadow of doubt that God is able. We need to stare hell in the face and say, My God is able, but if He doesn’t, we still won’t bend or fold. We won’t allow what we face, to cause us to turn away from our God!

He is bigger than life and all the things we go through in it! He never promised us an easy life, but He did promise to never leave us. He did promise us His Holy Spirit, and He did promise us His peace! He has given us Himself. In Him are all the tools we need to successfully navigate through life.

So, if you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, try something different. Instead of focusing on your problems, focus on the power within you, the power of the true and living God, who has declared you “More than a conqueror through Christ (Romans 8:37).” You’re going to think about your troubles, there’s no doubt, but don’t dwell on them. After you think about them, pray for a solution and then go in faith and be at peace knowing that God is in control.