Wants hurt.

I remember as a kid, we’d be riding down the street with our parents and we’d see a fast food restaurant and immediately we’d be hungry. We could’ve just ate at home, but somehow seeing the fast food restaurant would make us think we’re hungry. I remember asking could we stop and get something to eat. Sometimes the answer would be yes, but sometimes the answer would be no. I dreaded the word no. I’d pout, whine, try to convince my mom that she really meant yes. I’d get upset, but she remained unbothered. She’d say, “You never get too old for your wants to hurt.” Nan, nan, nan,” I’d say, as I silently mocked her by babbling in my mind and rolling my eyes. I had a strategy though, which upped my chances of a yes, by twenty five percent. I’d ask whichever brother was the baby at the time to ask my mom for me. I not only did this when we were out, I did it at home too, and then one day, this happened…
Six year old Me: “Robert, go ask momma if you can have some candy. Don’t say that I told you to ask. Just say, ‘Momma, can I have some candy?’ Okay?”
Two year old Robert: “Okay!”
Six year old me: (In my mind) This is going to be like stealing candy from a baby. *rubs hands* while listening nearby. 👂🏾
Two year old Robert: “Momma, can Robert have some candy?”
Six year old me: 🤦🏾‍♀️ “Dangit. He just blew my cover. 👮🏾‍♀️ Cover blown, move out!” I said to myself, rushing back to my room like an undercover officer who’d been exposed.
Mom: (Laughing, because she knew I was behind this) “Yes, Robert can have some candy.”
Two year old Robert: (Rushing to my room with only enough candy for him) “Momma said, I can have some candy!” (He eats candy)
Six year old me: 😒🤗 “Great!” (Thinking) “Good for you, but what about me?” (Me going to face my fears) 😟 “Ma, can I have some candy?”
Mom: “Yes, and stop sending your brother to ask me.”
Six year old me: “Hurray!”
As an adult, we experience the same things just different scenarios. The only things that really change is our age and our wants. but if we are wise, also our mindset. Think about it. As a child, I was happy that my brother received candy, but I also felt some type of way because… “What about me?” As an adult, we see other people being blessed with the desires of our heart and we celebrate in their happiness or success but that want hurts and inside we’re screaming to God, “What about me?” It’s not that we need it, we desire it because we see it; like kid me, when passing those fast food restaurants. I had everything I needed. There was food at home, but I didn’t want the food at home. I wanted what I wanted and I wanted it right then! Again, we’re the same way as adult children of God. We overlook our current blessings because we want a different one. The blessing we want isn’t necessarily better, but it’s definitely convenient, and who doesn’t like convenience?Somehow, we believe that receiving what we want will satisfy us. It probably will temporarily until a new desire kicks in, and the present blessings become old news. This sounds horrible and sad, but this is really the reality of how many of us subconsciously think and act. You never get to old for your wants to hurt, and boy, do they hurt. “Not getting what you want feels good,” said no person ever. I say, “It may not feel good now, but it will work for your good later.” Sometimes when God tells us no, or if we think the answer could be no, we do like six year old me did. We ask people to pray for us. Maybe God will act if the right person/people prays like our Bishop, parents, or an elder of the church. We think that perhaps our chances of getting a yes from God will go up twenty five percent if we ask an evangelist or a missionary to pray for us. I know this sounds absurd, but we do this all the time as adult children of God. If we want to get a prayer through, we go to certain people, thinking if the right person pray, God will act. We’re too afraid of what He may tell us, so we ask others to go on our behalf; or we believe that maybe He can’t hear us. We know God’s not deaf, but perhaps there’s a disconnect, we think. So we connect to “the right people” because we already know that where two or more people are gathered in Jesus name, He is in their midst. Listen, there’s nothing wrong with soliciting prayers! I’m here for it! But the blood of Jesus gave you just as much right to go to God as it does your bishop, or a missionary or your grandmother. The Spirit of God lives in you and He desires intimacy with you. He loves the fact that people are praying on your behalf, but He doesn’t want you to be afraid to talk to Him in fear of His response or in fear that your wants will hurt. He wants us to trust Him enough to come to Him about the matters of our heart, no matter how big or small we think they are. He cares. God is not influenced by a person’s status, position, wisdom or works when He makes a decision. The Bible tells us, in Acts 10:34, “Then Peter opened his mouth, and said, Of a truth I perceive that God is no respecter of persons.” The Word also says, in Romans 11:33-34, “Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out! Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?” If the best answer for you is no, it doesn’t matter who prays for a yes on your behalf. The answer will still be no. That want will have to hurt, but you just gotta let it burn like Usher. Praise God anyhow and don’t be afraid to come to Him. A major way to build trust in a relationship or to build a relationship in general is to communicate. I believe that you can really tell how a person feels about you when you tell them no. If you don’t believe me, try it on a few people or that one person you always say yes to. If you say no and they flip out or treat you differently, then they were only there for the yes. The thing about God is, when He tests us, it’s not because He’s unsure of our motives, it’s to show us our own hearts. That want may hurt, but the Spirit of God can heal, and fill that void. His will for our lives extends beyond our wants or the way we currently feel. ❤️ Romans 8:18, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

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