I’ve learned that the best way to understand someone is to empathize with them, and the best way to empathize with them is to get out of your feelings and become selfless. You can’t understand anyone completely if all you hear is yourself. Your thoughts, opinions, and feelings are your perceptions of yourself and the world around you, and not necessarily others truth. So, we must be discerning before becoming defensive, and we must not only give an ear to hear but a heart to listen to what people are saying to us. Be wise in the way in which you deal with people, but also be understanding.
Wisdom is supreme — so get wisdom.
And whatever else you get, get understanding.